Monday, August 24, 2009

Welcome Back, Welcome Back, Wel-come Ba-ack

No, you haven't flashed back 30 years. But I found the theme song appropriate in this case.

After 22 months, PPAF has finally made her appearance.

I don't know whether to laugh or cry. It's been nice being able to avoid the tampon aisle for as long as I have. I knew, logically, she had to come back sometime. And with Nate sleeping better at night, I knew it was imminent. But it still surprised me to look down today and see the evidence. It does reinforce that the weaning process is indeed working.

Tonight, I'll be pulling out the BBT that has been tucked away in my bedside table drawer for almost two years. We're not preventing. We're just seeing what happens.

I'm not sure if I'm ready for all this again. The charting. The timing. The waiting. The inevitable disappointment.

But when I look at Nate's sweet smile, I get a sense of hope. That, like the first go round, it will all be worth it in the end.


Meghan said...

I had mixed emotions for my first AF also. Although at one point I realized that it was the first time in 2 years that I wasn't in tears over it.

I couldn't bring back the BBT, I just don't have it in me right now. So we're just going with whatever happens, happens. And I'm not holding my breathe on anything actually happening!

Fertilized said...

i applaud your attitude and wish the absolute best

Melissa said...

Wow, I can't believe you escaped AF for so long! Mine came back 3 months postpartum despite exclusive breastfeeding/pumping.

This is my first cycle TTC #2. It feels strange to be back here again. I hope we both see speedy BFP's soon - good luck!! :)

Somewhat Ordinary said...

Wow, almost 2 years-that is an awesome break! Wishing you the best!

Anonymous said...

i had mixed feelings about AF's return too. mine came back when A was 10 months old. we got back in the game immediately as i will be 37 in october... i'm not temping but have a CBEFMonitor. i'm still up at various hours of the night with A so not sure how temping would work. it's hard to go back but easier in a way when you have proof of the pay off. good luck!

Theta Mom said...

Great attitude and best of luck!

BTW, thanks for the follow on twitter. I am following you back and also on your blog. :)